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How to fix the RAM - Explaining to a girl over phone! |
“Women and Americans are kinda dumb at PCs”. I really don’t know why people say it so! I don’t! Even if you may conclude part of it from the conversation transcript below. ;)
Well, I would be dead tomorrow if I had to disclose the real name of the girl in this conversation over my blog. So lets call her simply “Girl”. Please do not make any generalised statements over the example cited below. I am just sharing my experience. I do not want a Women’s commission to sit in front of my house with a dharna or any of those Geeky Tech Girls (anytime smarter than me) hack into my blog!
Just to be safe let me put this disclaimer: :P
The events and characters mentioned in this blog post are fictitious. Any similarity to actual persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.
Ok here we go… A friend of mine called me up and…
Girl: My PC is not working. Someone told me that its because of the RAM, as my PC is making a “Peeng…Peeng…” sound.
Me: Hmm. Yea looks like a RAM problem. There must be some dust or moisture on the RAM.
Girl: Can you come over to my place and get it right? This Tuesday?
Me: Yup sure. Just keep a screw driver handy.
After a couple of hours there are a few missed calls on my cell. So I call her back.
Girl: Hey I have opened the cabinet of my PC.
(Wow! Who the hell said that only guys were adventurous?)
Me: Hey cool! So u wanna fix your RAM right?
Girl: Yup. Ok tell me, which side of the cabinet is the RAM… Left or Right?
Me: UH! No not that way. See our PC motherboards are the same. Can you see 2 off-white coloured slots there?
Girl: Yes there are two I guess.
Me: Good. Those are the slots. Ok so can you see a RAM chip there… right?
Girl: Hmm…well I don’t think so.
Me: Yaar there must be in one of them. Both are empty?
Girl: Yes… I guess so.
Me: (Wdf! Where did the RAM go!) Ok tell me wats there then.
Girl: Ok there is this CD ROM ka thing… Floppy Drive…and…
Me: Wait…wait…a minute… You looking at your motherboard right?
Girl: Motherboard….. oh no… I was talking abt these CD ROM and stuff. There is this wire that goes from the CD ROM to….
Me: Nah! You seem to have got it the wrong way. The RAM is on the motherboard.
Girl: Oh! Ok… let me get to the motherboard haan… wait a sec.
Me: Okie… I am holding on…
Girl: Ya. So tell me…
Me: Ok so can you see 2 white or off-white coloured PCI slots at the center of the motherboard?
Girl: Yes. There is this PCI written.
Me: Ok there must be another slot with AGP written aside. Now get to the slots where nothing is written. Must be off-white in colour.
Girl: Hmm… no re… but I guess there are blue ones…
Me: Blue? (Hoping that she has still got the right one) Hmm ok maybe… it’s that way in urs. Or is it…?
Girl: Ya ya… I found the RAM.
Me: Oh great!
Girl: There is this one slot empty and one has a chip in it. Ok tell me how big is a RAM?
Me: It’s like say roughly 15cms long and say about max 2 inches in height…it’s fixed vertically upright in the slot.
Girl: Hmm… Yes then this is the one.
Me: Ok… so now you got to remove it. Just get your hands static free.
Girl: Hey tell me, it has like small capacitors. You sure this is the one right?
Me: (Pause) Ok… this time you have got hold of the Modem probably. Look in the center yaar… this one must be to the side of the board.
Girl: Yea… it’s like to the edge.
Me: Ok… so can you figure out the RAM now? 2 white slots…with a RAM chip in one of them. Green colour… plain… no capacitor nothing.
Girl: Hmm….hmm….yea looks like this should be it.
Me: It better be! :P
Girl: So what do I do now?
Me: Ok touch some metal part around you. Your palm… fingers… get them static free…
Girl: I can’t find any metal part in here.
Me: Not in there yaar… Ok… the side of the cabinet? The one that’s not painted, touch that.
Girl: Ok… Doing that… done…
Me: Hmm… Now can you see 2 clips that are holding the RAM? Put them away such that the RAM automatically pops up on top.
Girl: Hmm… ok..yea.. Removed them. But the RAM has not come out.
Me: OK… remove it.
Girl: Done…
Me: Now you can wipe it off with your hands only… Can you see a golden lining at the bottom? Just remove any dust on it. Just wipe it with your fingers.
Girl: Done.
Me: Now just remove any dust from the other slot. You got to put this RAM in here. Just in case the other one was damaged.
Girl: Ok Done. Now what?
Me: Ok your RAM will have a notch somewhere in between which divides it into two unequal parts. So will your slot have. Get it aligned the right way to enter in.
Girl: Hmm got it the right way.
Me: Now place the RAM over the slot and apply slight pressure on both the sides using your thumbs so that the RAM goes in and the clips snap back to hold the RAM. Remember both sides should go in simultaneously.
Girl: Ok it’s not going…
Me: Apply a little more pressure.
Girl: No its not. Do I require to press it like real hard?
Me: Nooh… that might break it. Ok just check if you have got the smaller side of the RAM into the smaller division of the holder…the slot…I mean
Girl: Wait… yea it looks like OK.
Me: Then try again… it has to go in…
Girl: Yea… pressing… no its not.
Me: Uh! Its easy… it just requires a little more pressure than what you are applying… And the clips should automatically snap back.
Girl: Ok one side has gone in.
Me: Just one side? Both should go in simultaneously
Girl: Ok the other also now.
Me: Hmm… Is the RAM moving now?
Girl: No… Ok put the clips also.
Me: Ok… looks like you are done. Just assemble things back… and get your PC powered.
Girl: Ok will check back and let you know.
After about 30mins I get a call.
Girl: Yea PC is working! Was a tough job… You should really appreciate me…
Me: Yea you did a great job!
Girl: Yipee!
Did I hear a “THANKS A MILLION” ok shorter… “THANKS” common say @least the “T” of Thanks :(
Well this was still way too easier. Had another friend of mine, she made atleast 10 calls to me to get her Windows XP installed over the phone. Freaky! I thought it was the easiest job on earth!
Both the above girls will be joining IT companies in a quarter. :P (Girls Please read above mentioned disclaimer also).
Hehe… ok… am not taking a shot at any girl with this post… It’s just that PC noobies really flush your brain out for simple tasks… I hope that they really get better in the second time!
Lolz….funny incident. You should see how the calls come in convergys for Tech support from gals.
LOL
I have my elder sis. So i know. U r right. My sis too ll be joining a foreign tech co. as a s/w engg. at the end of this semester. i stay far away frm home (for my studies). a few weeks ago my sis called me at least 5 times while reinstalling windows xp. And after installation she was without net for many hours - until i told her over phone how to again ’set up’ dataone :D
had to tel a gal how to do port forwarding… literally made me mad that day
LOL. quite funny
I had once had a even more tough time asking my parents to open browser & goto site ipaddress.com to check my IP so tat i can logon remotely. All he did was opened nautilus(file manager in linux) and was searching for address bar to type the address..
But imagining the girls at IT companies.. really sick..
ya man really ironical that girls who know nothing about computers are going to join IT companies :). God save the company.
But … are RAM fixed in PCI slots? :|
This girl is smart. I’ve had a guy break his RAM into two when I asked him to apply pressure. Well at least she dared and tried on her own, give her credit for that. (Or curse, considering you couldn’t go to her place now then…)
LOL..
I guess this happens when explaining this to every noob. My friend called me 10 times to make sure that he wont loose data which are stored in other drives if he reinstalls.. LOL, Killed me by calling again and again when installing.
@Harsh LOL at the last sentence in bracket.
LOL..That was funny…
I did have a similiar incident, but I was tryin to explain how to fix a CD Drive to a girl, she literally counted the no of pins over there…
Eventually, it couldn’t be fixed…
N yea, dont ask me who that was….n she too got into an IT company…
Thanks for pointing out the error Harsh… My Insert button was on when I wrote the post and it ate up a couple of lines :P. Got them back there.
BTW I have nothing against girls… This is just an incident.
hey aseem that was so damn sexist…
naming the girl as “girl” made it worst..
pls refrain frm sexist articles in future
Let me see if I got it right. The blog entry is about a girl noob, but it’s not a real story, just something you made up? And you are really just frustrated with noobs in general?
Heh.. Well, explaining things to people who don’t understand a thing (”where is the control panel?”) is extremely frustrating. But I have to say that parents are the worse because they forget the simplest things you teach them. If they ever manage to do it in the first place…
@adarsh: Dude.. y do you always see something thats not there in there? This blog post has got nothing to do with “girls”. Its just about abt noobs in general. Coincidently 2 girls in this case.
@Tina: Well not really Tina, I have not made it up. But yea… its about frustration with noobs in general. And yea parents are the worst for this! For the last 4 years I have been trying to explain them how to use Microsoft Word!
Wow had a good time reading this …… couldnt control my laugh..
Well,
I had a couple of incidents as well. I was on phone for around 2.5 hrs for remotely installing Windows XP. I thought normal xp installation takes only 30 minutes :(
ROFL …..
A friend of mine was too much worried bout his CPU , even though , he got it repaired ( donno who the hell did it !) , his CPU worked fine when he took it to his vendor, but failed to start up at his home , that was darn funny !!
I accidently visited his home and saw the whole drama taking place , and finally i plugged in the monitor cable and everything worked fine . Lol , it was only for the cable that he spared 250/- for nothing ( Poor technicians , they are super noobs :( )
Be glad that they are not asking you to create their gmail Id